This blogger was talking about how the phrase "friend-zone" is offensive, which I totally didn't get at first, but now I do - ask in the comments if you're interested in that! But point being, I responded with a question about how to help deal with my fear of "leading someone on." I loved her response:
"When it comes to ‘leading someone on’, know that it’s not actually something you can do. That’s a myth. How someone else interprets your actions is on them. How they respond is on them. You just be you in the most positive way possible. If that means letting someone down, let them down. If it means going on a date to make up your mind, that’s fine too. That’s what dates are for. When you make up your mind, your choice is good. Just because it’s not what the other person wants doesn’t mean you aren’t allowed to make it. Especially when it comes to starting a relationship.
It is good though that you’re being honest and communicating. The best thing would be to get to a place where you can feel comfortable telling your date that you’re on the fence about them. This guilt over your choice shouldn’t be. You own you. You should look after your best interest. A good friend, a good partner, will respect that. You deserve that."
AWESOME.
Now, I do think "leading someone on" is possible, not in that you can control how someone perceives your actions, but if you're actively trying to be deceitful about your intentions. But that's not something that's a problem for me. So basically...I can let go of that! Let that one fly off like a balloon the moment it's released.
PHEW. Feels good.
"When it comes to ‘leading someone on’, know that it’s not actually something you can do. That’s a myth. How someone else interprets your actions is on them. How they respond is on them. You just be you in the most positive way possible. If that means letting someone down, let them down. If it means going on a date to make up your mind, that’s fine too. That’s what dates are for. When you make up your mind, your choice is good. Just because it’s not what the other person wants doesn’t mean you aren’t allowed to make it. Especially when it comes to starting a relationship.
It is good though that you’re being honest and communicating. The best thing would be to get to a place where you can feel comfortable telling your date that you’re on the fence about them. This guilt over your choice shouldn’t be. You own you. You should look after your best interest. A good friend, a good partner, will respect that. You deserve that."
AWESOME.
Now, I do think "leading someone on" is possible, not in that you can control how someone perceives your actions, but if you're actively trying to be deceitful about your intentions. But that's not something that's a problem for me. So basically...I can let go of that! Let that one fly off like a balloon the moment it's released.
PHEW. Feels good.
